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Oh, sorry, thanks for removing it :) You're right that I should break up the text more, it made it much easier to read :)

I found the read quite interesting :) A bit "plain", but that shouldn't stop you from writing more. I just started writing my own story too, and I've been thinking some about what I want to get out...

Hello, I've just started to write a story and I wanted to run it past some people to see what you think. I'm also struggling to come up with a good title, I'm going for something "realistic" in NYC,...